On hearing about the Sonia hoax caller, the first instinct of a reputed media communications expert was to suggest that the cheeky prankster be hired as the party president’s voice double. As in any mature democracy with a free and fair media, the most powerful politician in India has to address many press conferences, give multiple interviews, interact with myriad stakeholders and address diverse audiences. Given her many media engagements, it is only natural that the UPA chairperson should hire a voice double. A discussion ensued between the media expert, the fawning party worker and the shrewd durbari.
The fawning party worker speculated that it would be handy to have spare ‘Sonia’ to grace multiple coteries with multitudes of obsequious party workers. After all, there are too few Gandhis to fawn over. A fake Gandhi voice is worth fawning over just for its timbre. The shrewd Congress durbari understood that there was little threat of detection, given that a shadowy powerful voice dictating government policy is business as usual in India.
The fawning party worker however, did have his doubts. He wondered if the voice double would shy away from the media as the spare ‘Sonia’ might not be as well educated and well informed as the UPA Chairperson. The voice was definitely chatty but was it media savvy? Moreover the ‘voice’ was meddling with CBI cases while the UPA government is deeply committed to maintaining the independence of the premier investigation agency. The fawner voiced his concerns and concluded that it would be best to use spare ‘Sonia’ sparingly and cocoon the spare ‘Sonia’ from media glare.
The shrewd durbari agreed. After all, there were numerous examples of many dear leaders of other democratic mango republics who are inaccessible to the media. Being incommunicado fuels mystery about the capabilities of the great leader in any true democracy and adds to her mystique. Infallibility and certitude fueled by an incurious media is in keeping with the spirit of the fourth pillar of democracy. Media questioning powerful politicians is suitable for Western style democracies but is ill suited to the culture of the world’s largest democracy. Communication is for courtiers, leadership is about making yourselves scarce.
The shrewd durbari proceeded to heap scorn on the verbal explosion of the opposition. The opposition was speaking enough for both the parties, he suggested. The opposition leadership sometimes speaks with many voices, the shrewd durbari observed with derision. The fawning party worker said a silent prayer, thanking God that his party leadership was blessed with the gift of gag.
The fawning party worker knows that media scrutiny is for hapless Prime Ministers and great leaders are shoulders above such posts and positions. It was up to the PM to dodge media’s questions of responsibility. The shrewd durbari acknowledged that the silent PM is being used as ventriloquist’s doll, giving voice to his political masters. But since PM Manmohan also uses his voice sparingly, he needs a spare voice. The media expert suggested that Manmohan needed a voice to articulate reformist policies. The expert concluded that the PM’s reformist self had been stifled and that the voice double would serve as an economist’s alter ego while the PM could continue to mouth platitudes for the aam aadmi. The fawning party worker was indifferent to the PM’s voice or lack thereof. The media expert and the shrewd durbari then concluded that the hoax “Sonia” caller is best employed as Manmohan’s voice double.
